January 29, 2007

Movie Night

Melissa and I were debating over our monthly No-Kid Movie Outing:

"I don't want to see Dreamgirls, How about Children of Men? It's supposed to be good. Has your Clive Owen in it."
"Bleah. Looks all emo/apocalyptic-y. How about Night at the Museum?"
"A semi-family comedy on our night AWAY from the kid? No. Something adult-oriented would be nice. Preferably with death in it."
"All right..."
"And not some tragic, SLOW death of some strong-spirited woman by cancer. Guns or Kung Fu must be involved."
"All RIGHT. *grumble*"

Then we scrolled down on the listings to see: Chow Yun Fat in "Curse of the Golden Flower". Chow Yun Fat? No contest. We're there.

Curse of the Golden Flower, brought to us by Zhang "House of Flying Daggers" Yimou shows off the greatest strengths that China has. Namely hundreds of thousands of extras willing to die in great heaps. If you've seen Chow Yun Fat in "A Better Tomorrow" then you know what I mean. Peter Jackson would have needed some heavy CGI budget to create armies of the magnitude seen here, but when you're in China, why bother?

Also starring in this film: Probably every single Chinese woman with large breasts. I think ol' Zhang wanted to buck the stereotype, so every last down-gazing servant girl in a shiny outfit is showing at least 6 inches of clevage apiece. Or maybe the guy just has a fetish.

Overall, a good movie that falls short of being great. It starts out simply enough, and keeps adding tension and peeling back layers at a good pace. Then the Ninjas show up. Unfortunately, this event was a good hour into the film, and all we had in terms of fight scenes to tide us over to this point, was a bit of sparring between emperor (Fat) and his son. The eye-popping set and costume design will probably keep you distracted enough not to notice while you're actually in the theater, though.

Then it comes down to the final battle:
(1) HAHA! I have an army of thousands, all decked out in my designer Golden Armor!
(2) Oh Yeah? Well *MY* army of thousands has cooler Silver/gray armor, the practical upshot of which is that they can stay hidden until your glaringly bright Golden Boys spring the trap!

And finally:
(3) Hmmph! Now that you two are finished playing war, MY army of thousands has to come in and clean up all the bodies! Sheesh, look at all these broken flowerpots! You two are going to get such a whuppin!

Final Verdict: (B) Total Eye Candy. A beautiful cast, amazing sets and costumes, but very little fighting and an ending that doesn't.

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