April 10, 2006

Rant #4

My friends know me as a fairly laid-back, easy-going guy. It's true, but that doesn't mean that things don't piss me off. I have a prepared rant. *ahem*

People With Their Own Special Place Waiting in A Fiery Afterlife


- The marketing manager who decided to put movie previews that you can't skip through on the DVD I paid $20 for. Remember when the movies would just start up when you put them in? Previews are great IN THE THEATER, but I could care less about the 15th Anniversary Special Edition Re-Release of "Blood-Sucking Pharaohs in Pittsburgh". It stands to reason that half of the people buying Pirated movies do it because they just want THE MOVIE and not the ads.

- Anyone who puts a TIP line on a receipt for a Take-Out resturant. Let me get this straight: I order the food, I drive to your restaurant to pick it up, drive it home, put it on my own plates and get my own drink... and you want an extra couple of bucks just for YOUR trouble? How exactly does that make you as deserving as a waiter who does all of this FOR me?

- People who cut into a funeral procession in order to cruise through the red lights. A man has shuffled off this mortal coil, and his loved ones are going to bury him. Show a little respect. Your TacoBell will stay warm on the passenger seat for another couple of minutes, jerk.

- Family members of famous long-dead authors or musicians trying to collect royalties on their relative's famous creations. I think the current system of "Author's Lifetime + 70 Years" is plenty of time for the immediate offspring to collect royalties on dear old dad's book or song. Any more after that and it's sniveling whiny brats who have no ambition of their own. Prime example was Victor Hugo's realtives complaining that they didn't get any money from Disney's poor decision of making "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" into a cartoon for kids. The man wote the book in 1831, died in 1885, and now, great-grandkids of the man want cash because Disney made gargoyle action figures? Suck it up and accomplish something on your own. Be honored that your ancestor contributed sonething to the world and celebrate that accomplishment. I don't expect my grand-kids to collect royalty checks from my company for the software I wrote in 2001, I expect them to make their own living.

- Likewise, the people trying to fight for their copyright protection for the "Happy Birthday" song. It's ten measures, it's world famous. Take credit that you deserve, put it on a resume and you'll be guaranteed a job. But if you want a $1 because I sang it at my kid's B-day party, you better pack a lunch, you'll be waiting a while.

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