November 12, 2004

LinkNews Digest [11/12/2004]

Packs of Vicious Carrion-Feeders, and Coyotes Invade White House

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Coyotes, the rangy animals associated with the American West, have been spotted in the U.S. capital for the first time, sparking gossip in precincts where talk usually turns on politics.

"On our way home from a party tonight, my son spotted a coyote trotting among the trees," one writer said in an e-mail group for one of Washington's tonier sections.

Residents of the Washington area have reported seeing coyotes for months and The Washington Post warned last summer that household pets could fall prey to the omnivorous creatures.

But coyotes' presence inside the city limits was confirmed only in September by a naturalist on duty in the woods of Rock Creek Park. "I suspect we've had coyotes close by for some time. We've just discovered them recently," Michael Bean, chairman of the wildlife program at the Environmental Defense group, said on Friday.

Coyotes originally roamed in what is now the northwestern corner of the United States, but have expanded their range over the last 200 years to include all of North America except the extreme northeast portions of Canada.

The real-life coyote should not be confused with the hapless cartoon Wile E. Coyote, eternal loser in his desert battle of wits with the Roadrunner, Bean said.

Does this remind anyone else of Scar's alliance with the Hyenas in "The Lion King"? Maybe it's just me.

"Pass The Ammo" - The Home Edition

MEXICO CITY (Reuters) - Angry parishioners chained shut a church in central Mexico on Friday in protest at the firing of their priest, whose habit of tucking a gun under his robes has earned him fame and the nickname "Padre Pistolas."

Hundreds of people from the town of Chucandiro demonstrated outside the cathedral in the city of Morelia after Catholic church leaders there defrocked their gunslinging priest, Alfredo Gallegos, local media reported.

"We have closed the church with chains and that's how it will stay until Father Alfredo comes back," protester Gilberto Moron was quoting as saying, adding that locals would accept no other priest.

Gallegos is wildly popular with parishioners but has angered his Catholic superiors with his habit of wearing a shiny pistol beneath his robes, despite strict laws in Mexico banning private citizens from carrying guns.

Also known for his love of cowboy boots and country music, Gallegos says he only carries a gun for protection, noting several of his friends have been killed over the years.

Locals say he has brought them huge social benefits, helping the marginalized and raising money for roads and hospital projects. "He has united us as a people," said Moron.

Church leaders gave no reason for sacking the priest.

"It's Like Gravy, With Bubbles In It..."

SEATTLE (Reuters) - After the startling success of its turkey and gravy-flavored soda during last year's U.S. holiday season, a Seattle soda company will be serving up green beans and casserole, mashed potatoes, fruitcake and cranberry flavors.

"Last year, the response to our Turkey and Gravy Soda was overwhelming, but we really didn't have side dishes to go with it," Peter van Stolk, chief executive of specialty soda maker Jones Soda Co., said on Monday.

The tan-colored turkey and gravy-flavored soda sold out last year in three hours after it was offered on the Web and later fetched prices over $100 on eBay Inc.

This year, Jones Soda is offering the turkey and gravy sodas as a set in 15,000 "holiday packs" for $16 each, complete with utensils.

Particularly noteworthy on the menu is the green beans and casserole soda, van Stolk said, adding, "We're proud that we accented this dish with fried onions."

The pack was available nationwide at limited retail locations, including Target Corp. stores, beginning on Monday.

1 comment:

  1. For anyone else who remembers the most obscure Saturday Night Live skits, I think that this is entirely appropriate: