January 07, 2004

After venting the issue of the Friend in the Marriage-in-name-only to my good friend Sam (of the incredible Bread Pudding recipe), he gave me some good advice, which went along with some of my own philosophies. I'll paraphrase them both here:

It may do YOU some good to be able to see things coming, but it won't help other people. You could be Noah, saying that the world's going to flood, and no matter how emphatically you shout it, no matter that God himself told you this, people will not believe you. People only make decisions based on their own experiences. Sometimes you have to let people have these bad experiences in order for them to learn from them. Do what you can, tell them what you know, but from then on, it's their responsibility to act on it or not. And don't spend all your time trying to warn people, when you need to be building your ark to save yourself (along with your wife and various pets).

Although he is my friend and I care for his welfare a great deal, this is ultimately his decision, and he will live with it. If staying in a reduced relationship under these circumstances is what will make him happy, then Melissa and I will bite our tongues and play Rosencrantz and Guildenstern to his Hamlet, and by our company "To draw him on to pleasures."

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